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* Does not include Ham, Sausage, or Bacon as they all taste really good.

** After the kids move out I am not responsible if they choose to eat yummy cuts of meat.

Doh! - In case you haven't figured it out, this website is obviously a parody.  If you are a member of PETA or any other group of crazy animal lovers that think animals should have the same rights as people.... Give it up and have a steak would you, you are looking way to thin.  For those who aren't Nazi's and sincerely care about the well being of animals and people we recommend American Humane

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Porkie In Happier Times?

Save Porkie!

Porkie may not be the cutest pig on the planet, but he is just as meaningful to me as Toby is to his owner. Unfortunately, he will DIE on December 31st, 2005 if you donít help. I rescued him a few days ago. I found him at my local Safeway, cold, apparently severely injured from what appeared to be an attack from a disgruntled butcher. I took him in, knowing he had no chance to live from his injuries, but miraculously, he is still here. I have since spent several days nursing him to health. Porkie is a fighter, thatís for sure.

Unfortunately, on December 31st, 2005, Porkie will die. I am going to eat him. I am going to take Porkie to a park and barbeque this sweet pig. I will then prepare Porkie for a New Years feast. I have several recipes under consideration, which can be seen, with some pretty graphic images, under the recipe section.

Porkie As He Appears Today

Now I know you are thinking "this is just a cut of meat", and you are right, it is, but it's just as important to me as some guys rabbit.  Besides I am going to go even further than he does.  If we reach our goal we will not eat any pork steaks* like Porkie ever again.  Ever!  Not just me but my entire family of 5**. (Hey, I buy the groceries I make the rules!)  Just think of how many poor defenseless pigs like Porkie can be saved.

If we can raise the 50,000$ we will spend such funds having Porkie cryogenically frozen, a process we have already begun.  We are doing this in the hopes that science will advance enough in the future to take Porkie's DNA and somehow someway bring my friend back using cloning or whatever science may come up with in the future.

I donít want to eat Porkie, he is my friend, and he has always been the most loving, adorable cut of meat. However, God as my witness, I will devour this little guy unless I receive 50,000$ USD into my account from donations or purchase of merchandise. You can help this poor, helpless pig's cause by making donations, or by purchasing merchandise at the online store.

Be sure to check out our other pages with delicious recipes, a gallery and a page for Porkie's travels. Tshirts coming soon and more!

Friends of Porkie

I will be listing all those making donations to Porkie here and on the other friends of Porkie pages so be sure to let me know how you want to be listed in your donations.

Golden Porkie Sponsors What are you Nutz about?

more friends of Porkie coming soon

©2005 From the twisted mind of Michael Larson

Porkie BBQ Apron
Save Porkie BBQ Apron Now Available!